About 2 years after my wife and I were married, we were asked by a family to baby sit their small children for a week while their father and mother went out of town. We also had a small baby of our own who wasn’t yet a year old. With their children and ours, we would be watching six children under the age of 8 years old! The plan was for us to live at their house for the week so that the children would be able to sleep in their own beds and remain in familiar surroundings.

 I was still in school at the time and working, so the brunt of the baby-sitting responsibilities fell to my wife. Looking back on it now, I wonder just what made us think that we could take on this kind of responsibility with so many young children all at once. It could have been a real nightmare.

 What we didn’t know, however, was that their mother had gained a lot of experience with child rearing and had a very strict schedule for the children. Their schedule started early in the day, but it also finished early in the evening. In fact, I vividly remember waking up around 6 a.m. because I could feel a “presence.” It was a young six-year-old who had awoken and had come in to investigate who these new people were that were asleep in her parents’ bed.

Not everything went smoothly. But, they went better than we expected. The secret was in their schedule and in keeping to it.

 We live in a world that is full of rhythm. Days, weeks, months, years, seasons. The ebb and flow of time swirls about us and wraps us in a soft blanket of rhythm. Many times, we are not aware of the rhythm in our lives. But, when it is missing, we crave it.

 Why is rhythm so important to us as human beings? Probably because we desire predictability. Rhythm helps us to remember when to eat, when to sleep, when to go to church, when to go to school, when to go to music lessons, etc. We can predict when we need to be where. And the activities that we go to, if they are relatively the same day in and day out, also help our comfort level. Because they are predictable. We know what to expect.

 Humans aren’t the only ones that like rhythm. Animals like rhythm as well. Recently, we watched two of our grandchildren for a week while their mom and dad went on a business trip. (Are you starting to see a pattern here?) We stayed in their house on a ranch in Montana. Along with the children, we were expected to care for three dogs and a cat. Every morning and every evening, we would go out to the dog kennels to feed them and take them for a run/walk around the ranch. If I was ever tardy in the evening, the dogs would get restless and start to bark at me. “Come and let us out!” they seemed to be saying. “It is time for our evening meal and exercise!” The dogs and cat were accustomed to the same activities at the same time every day. They looked forward to our time together.

 Likewise, I have noticed the deer daily migration when we are in the mountains. Each day they come down from higher places where they have been bedding down. They come to feed in the lush meadow and drink from the small creek that passes through. They graze throughout the day and then they travel the same trails back up the mountain in the early evening. They also migrate to lower elevations as it becomes winter. They sense that it is time to move to lower pastures in the Fall. They winter over in lower elevations and then, like clockwork, in the Spring, at the same time each year, they travel back to the higher elevations for the summer.

 We share our love of rhythm  with all of nature.

 Rhythm gives us predictability. When we are able to predict what will happen and when, it provides us with a sense of security. “All is right with the world because dinner comes at the same time every day,” the dogs told me through their exuberance and sheer joy each and every night when I went out to feed them.

 But, our rhythms change and we must adapt. A young child goes to school for the first time. Suddenly, the safe rhythms of his home are upset. Instead of being able to remain at home with regular feedings and naps, there is a new time structure and it is shared with different people and in unfamiliar surroundings. Indeed, people – the folks with whom we must interact on a regular basis – and surroundings are also a part of the essential elements of rhythm.

 It isn’t just about a schedule.

 So, what do we do when our rhythms change? We adapt to the new rhythm. We learn its idiosyncrasies – the schedule, the surroundings, the people, what we can expect, what is expected of us.

 Some people adapt better than others. Some people adapt sooner, others later. But, the sooner we can adapt and accept the new rhythm(s) the happier we are. The better we can predict what will happen in our lives and when.

 Now, not all new rhythms are good things. When a person goes to jail, for example, they are subjected to very strict new rhythms in their lives. Upsetting rhythms. Constricting rhythms. Restricting rhythms. New daily schedules. New weekly schedules. Days turn to weeks, which turn to months, and then to years. There is newness to each rhythm upon a rhythm upon a rhythm. Getting used to such restrictive rhythms may be unpleasant. Rhythms may be nasty, like having to go through dialysis on a regular basis, or chemo-therapy. Or there may be a rhythm of abuse and cruelty in a household. Nevertheless, whether a particular rhythm is bad or good does not diminish the power that rhythm has in our lives.

 Sometimes, there are things that disturb the rhythms of our lives. Natural disasters, tragedies, bad luck, death; or on the other hand, extremely good luck, promotions, new babies, etc. It can be anything – good, mediocre or bad. We learn to deal with disruptions during these times. As creatures of rhythm, we are OK to step outside of our rhythm cycles for a while. But, we naturally strive to get back to some sort of rhythm as soon as we can.

 I served in the US Army for nearly 30 years. During that time, we learned first as a couple, then as a family, how important rhythm was to our well-being. In the Army, during the course of a career, Soldiers are assigned to many duty stations depending on the stage of their career. Our first duty station was for initial basic officer training. Our second duty station was overseas and was our first “real” assignment where I was expected to do a specific job. Our third duty station was again for training. Each duty assignment had a rhythm of its own. During my initial basic officer training, we were also taught what a “successful” 20 year career looked like. I did not realize it at the time, but they were only trying to get us familiar with the rhythm of what we could expect during the next 20 years.

 Each duty station also had its own rhythm for my family. During our first duty station, our second son was born. During the second, we had twin girls. During later postings, we added an additional three children for a total of seven. And our children went through the rhythms of pre-school, kindergarten, elementary school, middle school, high school, college, and then left home to pursue their own rhythms. At one duty station, we had children in every one of these categories!

 We took a lesson from when we had baby sat for that small family so many years ago. My wife became a Master Scheduler. Our children were happiest when kept on a schedule. This was true as much for the babies as it was for our teenagers and young adults.  As soon as we hit the ground in a new place, we would establish the new schedules, take our children to see the new surroundings and meet the new people. The sooner they became engaged in the new rhythm, the sooner they settled down to getting on with life.

 When you are hit with a new situation, new surroundings, unexpected things that throw your rhythm into turmoil, the best thing to do, (after ensuring your personal safety and the safety of family and those around you,) is to establish your rhythm. You should try to get to bed at the same time every night and to arise in the morning at the same time. Eat at the same times every day and with the same people. Have your meetings at the same time and run them in the same way. Do everything within your power to create a workable, sustainable rhythm for yourself and for your loved ones.

 Understanding the principle of rhythm is important. By harnessing its power, you can bring more predictability to your life and to the lives of those dearest to you.